May i first start to apologise for being quiet and not posting for a while. I’ve been trying to think of ways to improve my blog, and in which direction to take it. I was even contemplating on deleting the whole thing and restarting, which, I may still do. but this weekend I witnessed something that I had to share with you guys.
I’ve always been a strong believer in meeting people for a reason. and this week was really that case, to be honest I couldn’t believe I was actually watching a real life action replay of exactly what I had went through, even down to the excuses. It was unbelievable. But how do you tell a person you met 2 days ago that her “twin flame is her false twin” and she is currently being gaslighted by a narcissist? although it’s hard to believe, but you can live without him. At first I thought ‘aw’ look this couple, they are made for each other’ until I started recognising the warning signs :- the over top we are so in love. the we are the perfect match. we are one. every thing I like he likes. You know the real in your face can you tell we love each other COUPLE? The ones who are not convincing us, but they are trying to convince them self’s. Then the attention seeking bagan. One twin always had to be center of attention, whilst the other would be talking about something close and important the other would start pulling stupid faces, or let’s go deeper. let’s get personal. the false twin is that absorbed in him self, that even though his suppose love of his life had just received the news her dad had passed away 3 hrs before. However it was highly important that he had to go and visit his deceased sons grave, and steal the spot light for himself. how egotistical can one be? A few hours passed. They had returned to my flat, and as I was sat getting ready for work, the false twin came in and asked if he could borrow the living room for a couple off hours? so he could surprise her with a takeaway and have a date night? Why I didn’t click on this guy is exactly like him…. Anyway I agreed, and me and George left for a couple hours. As we returned, the girl was in a mess. He’d popped out to get the food, but hadn’t come back. She was completely insane. completely manic, up and down at the window, ringing his friends, I’d even rang the police stations and the hospital. it was at that exact point I started to realise, this girl is going through what I had gone through. And Thats when I started digging a little deeper. Asking questions about the relationship. Especially, when she had mentioned that she felt bad sitting down, and wasn’t looking for him. Because he would then say ‘she didn’t care about him’ . And that’s when I pulled up the 20 warning signs your being gaslight. So I asked her these points :
1. Your intuition says there is something “off” about this person
2. You question your own reality and perception of events i.e. you doubt if things occurred the way you remember them
3. You often second guess your memory of details of past events
4. You constantly second guess yourself i.e. you doubt your decisions and choices
5. You are indecisive because you doubt yourself and you don’t trust your own judgment
6. You invalidate your own emotions. You question if you are too sensitive or jealous because he/she told you that you are overreacting or being overly sensitive
7. You feel confused a lot of the time
8. You lie out of fear. You start lying about things because of the fear of being wrong, criticized or being verbally attacked and condemned as insane, overreacting,
9. You are constantly hypervigilant; you feel stressed & threatened; you fear something bad happening and so you are always on the lookout and on-edge
10. You believe that you are bad person and the cause of the other person’s misery and troubles and he/she also reinforces that by stating that you are the problem and he/she is the victim of your behavior & mental state
11. You apologize a lot even when it’s not your fault.
12. You’ve become weak, unable to stand up or speak up for yourself; you’ve lost your old self-confidence
13. You don’t express your real emotions anymore, other than maybe crying when you can no longer hold them in
14. You feel depressed, isolated, helpless, hopeless, misunderstood
15. You don’t know who you are
16. You feel you are overly demanding; that’s what he/she says about you
17. You are constantly told, “It didn’t happen, it doesn’t matter, it’s your fault, you’re imagining things again, you are overreacting, you are overly sensitive, you are overly demanding, it’s all your fault, you can’t be trusted, you are crazy…”
18. You defend yourself against ridiculous accusations. He/she accuses you of twisted thinking or ulterior intentions & motives i.e. “You want to make me look stupid.”
19. You doubt your own sanity. This is the ultimate goal of the gaslighter. Why? Convincing you that you are insane, mentally ill or diseased gives him/her greater power and control over you.
20. You’ve been in this abusive relationship for so long that is all you know now, or, this is yet another example of the abusive relationships you have experienced. Unknowingly, you have been attracted to these relationships because of a subconscious belief that “this” is love or that “this” is what you deserve. Stop here. Do not blame yourself; ask for help to change your definitions and programs around love and to change what you subconsciously believe you deserve.
Now I’ve just realised, that some of you may of asked your self those questions, about your relationships. And now your panicking, that you are also being gaslighted. PLEASE DON’T Panic. AND PLEASE DON’T AUTOMATICALLY THROW AWAY YOUR Relationship. There is a lot more to it. And the reason for my blog is, to help you through it. And there are many other factors you must consider. But please also remember mental abuse, is just as bad as physical abuse. please don’t suffer in silence. if you have questions. please feel free to contact me. So let’s get back to the girl. I Could see her getting more and more upset, with each statement I read. you could see the pain on her face, as she is realising her fairy tale relationship isn’t the happy ever after she had imagined , but as I said to her, and I will say to you! ‘my followers, this isn’t the end of the world. we have to go through this, to learn to prepare us for our real twin. every person we meet in our lifes is for a reason. if you have only just started following my blog? please read my post about :- We meet people for a reason. Then this will all make a little more sense. And what makes this entry so special? is that at first I thought, I had met this girl, ‘to support her through the loss of her father and to show her that she is stronger than she thinks, and a few other reasons. And the reason why she had come into my life. Was to motivate me, and by motivate me, I mean in life in general. Motivation in day to day life, getting back Into routine, motivating me with my spiritual life practice. And it turns out the main reason was? To get me back, into writing my blog, but not just 1 post over the next few days / weeks but many more entries. you’ll be reading about the events leading up to the reason, I had to write this post . Although the reasons, I had said Id came into her life were those I’d mentioned, but it tuned out the biggest reason was…… to teach her about Twin flames and false twin flames and to open her eyes to her relationship………..